Short hair, and yes actually, I DO care.

I slumped onto the side of the tub in my towel. She was gone. I’d lost her. The last of the old me swirled down the drain with the rest of my pre-baby naiveties.  I grabbed the phone without pause and sent an SOS message to my hairstylist. I hadn’t been to the salon since my wedding day. It was time to call in the big guns.

A Funwell Getaway

As we’re driving I hear the sound of running water. What is that? Where is it coming from? I look down around my feet thinking I spilled my Contigo bottle of water. There’s nothing there. Not even my water bottle. I turn around and look behind me.  Maybe Finn spilled his sippy-cup…?

Body Image and Self Esteem After Baby

But what remained weren’t just stretchmarks and a C-section scar but deep seated wounds that disfigured my self-image. When I looked in the mirror my eyes instantly swelled with tears and I felt nauseous. I had no idea who that girl was staring back at me.

The Resurrection

But when I do, the most beautiful thing happens. My weary soul steps out of purgatory and into paradise. My baby boy is waiting and watching for me out the window. When I walk through that door his face lights up and that toothy grin spreads from ear to ear.

Time-Outs: They're Not Just For Toddlers

Motherhood hit me like a high-five, in the face, with a chair. But that was amateur hour compared to my introduction to the toddler years when shit got real. Just when I thought I had this whole mom thing figured out and I really clicked with my son he changed the rules of the game just. like. that.

Enough Already

I don’t have a daughter. So instead, I will teach my son what real beauty looks like. But I won’t stop
there. And I hope you won’t either. So please hear me out.

The Village

When you become a new mother you need a village to keep you grounded; to keep you tethered to who you are. You need all hands on deck to ensure that you don’t lose yourself in the process of giving every ounce of yourself back to this tiny human.

Three Months

What I couldn’t see at the time was just how strong I really was. And what I needed to learn was just how far I could bend without breaking

The New Normal

I was free falling down the rabbit hole of maternal guilt, regret and want. My head was spinning and my chest physically ached like a piece of my body was missing – because it was. I had forcefully pulled his tiny body away from mine and left him behind… 25 kilometres worth of behind.